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31 October 2014 @ 03:50 am
Dear My Lovely Julbok,

First of all, thank you! I'm really excited about Yuletide, it always brightens the end of my year, so really, I want the biggest take-away from this letter to be that I want you to enjoy writing whatever story it is that you write.

I know I say that now, and then throw a bunch of other info at you, but I promise you I read a *lot* of fic from all corners of the spectrum of what's available. I like the variety.

What *else* do I like? Aren't you glad I've finally decided to answer! (Dude, I apologize. Ever have a migraine? That was last week. It's starting to taper off now, so I thought I'd distract myself.) Well, I prefer happy, or at least hopeful endings, especially at this time of year. Don't ask why, 'cause I don't really know, but I always get wistful around the end of the year, and sad fic only sort of rubs salt in the wound, you know? If I'm braced for it, that's one thing. I do like seasonaly-theamed stuff, if you feel like embracing the snow and glitter. I like pointless, shmoopy fluff. And action-packed mission/mystery/op/case/thing stories. I think I might have officially moved into the category of people who like hurt/comfort fic (probably a long time ago). I adore banter and snark, and people who have each other's backs. I have a thing for competence a mile wide. Especially with weapons or horses, but really it turns out I'm not particular.

I prefer knives over Eskrima sticks, and Sticks over bows, and bows over guns, but guns over nothing; the stick thing has been a long-time love, but Bobbi Morse is pretty kick ass, and I'll admit, my heart really wants to see her and Teyla go at it some day. That's Agents of SHIELD and Stargate: Atlantis for you, if you're not a sci-fi person. Which may answer that burning question in the back of your mind: Do I like crossovers or fusions? The answer is a resounding Hell Yeah! I see crossovers as where the characters from each franchise meet each other, and fusions as where characters from one live in the world of the other. I don't know if the distinction means anything to you, but I'm a language geek, so it sort of does to me. But yes! I love crossovers, fusions, AUs! Distorted timelines, meeting different versions of themselves, stepping into a portal, and BAM! "Welcome to Sunnydale, we hope you enjoy your stay!" or "Who the hell are you, and how did you come through the Stargate?" /"...Land on our transporter pod? Scottie?...Mr. Spock?...Anyone?"/"...fall out of the sky and land on the Tower's newly reconstructed landing pad which *wasn't exactly built for *you*?* Ah, Thor! Good! Him, it was built for--*him*. And me. Me and him. Not...you. Who are you again?" Do you see where I'm going with this? Lovely.

It is in fact Yuletide, so there's no telling what kind of thing we matched on, or what other things we have in common, but if you do feel like writing a crossover, I can try to give you an abreviated list of stuff I'm totally covered in if you wanna go there. I'm not insisting, but I think sometimes people avoid doing that kind of thing because they're like "oh, I don't know if she'll even know the show I know well enough to bother writing it. So if you sorta wanted to write about any of this stuff anyway, and want to weave in the characters we matched on, it's be really awesome. Crossovers really are one of my favorite things. Dammit. Now I have that song in my head.

Buffy, Angel, Dollhouse, Firefly, Avengers, MCU (let's just call it like it is), Agents of Shield, NCIS: LA (actually, all of them, but I prefer LA, unless you wanna focus on Brodie in NO--She graduated from State, but "I don't 'root.'"--a girl after my own heart. Which is in need of repair afer Ziva left.), Farscape, Stargate SG-1, Stargate: Atlantis, *Season 1* of Orphan Black

[Like, why haven't dhampire's looked into cloning? their race *is* dying. Whould Clone!Rose have any kind of connection to Lissa? It *is* all magic, so would that shit clone, too? Or would that only clone if they did cloning the SG-1 way, whole body, as a teen with memories? Maybe then she wouldn't have to feel so bad about having to split her attention and desire about what she really wants to do with her life. One Rose to guard her from far away, another Rose to guard her person. Up close and personal. ;) She can have cake *and* pie.)

Or, hell, What kind of Gate team would Scorpion make? Or how could they help rebuild SHIELD? Would they? If Coulson, May, Skye, and FitzSimmons (you can handwave his nightmare brain damage, not because it's not important, but because I think we missed a lot of cool opportunities to see them recruit, and Scorpion would have been a good stop, and that would have been before we knew how much he was affected. I think the brain trust on the Bus would have a ball with our group of geiunses, and I'd like to see that--just, w/out the sad, is all. Or, if you keep it in, it'd be interesting to see how easily they understand where he's going with his half-finished sentences and things, because for them, half and idea is, like, all they need to see the whole thing fall into place. It'd be interesting to see Happy and Fitz work together. He's just *so* chatty, and she's just *so* not. Maybe Walter tries to counter-recruit after they all save the day? OH, Toby's psych rundown on them all would be epic. And fuckin' painful, man.

What if the Antares mission gets news that something tragic has happened on Earth, and they're not going to have anywhere to land because it's not safe for them, and that info's been kept from them for the last two years? It's time for them to swing back around--if they're going to. So...they don't. They keep going out, and either you go from there with whatever awesome you have on your own (I love stories that take place in contained spaces--no way, no where, to run from your problems) and they end up in the Pegasus Galaxy, and run in to the Atlantis crew/end up in the Uncharted Territories and run into the only damn human in that end of space, his wife, and their ship, their living ship. You know Jen and Zoe would go crazy over *that* particular discovery. I haven't kept up with the Farscape comics, so I don't know the story since the PK wars. But I love the idea of Zoe and Jen doing SPACE!SCIENCE! together (among other things...). If slash isn't your scene, don't work yourself up over it.

Actually, good time to make that point here, all on it's own. I'm aware that two of my requests came with the "I'd love to see them together" tag some people must, you know, sacrifice the blood of virginal misquitoes to the appropriate dieties for in hopes of not seeing those words appear in their assignment sheet. So I'd like to make something clear: If you'd like to write me some great intense romantic relationship that even includes explicit sex between Rose and Lissa or Jen and Zoe, or anyone from Scorpion, I've got fuckin' pom poms out to cheer you on. Hell, I'm planning to spam my own LJ with some pictorial inspiration later. A visual pat on the back for you, if you will. It'll turn out great, and I'm sure I'll love it.

I mean, you *know* the Scorpion crew has researched good moves and how not to be a bore in bed, Lissa and Rose have freakin' telepathy (sorta, shut up I'm making a point) and *vampire feeding* (yes, that's a kink i have, feel free to run with it) they can mix in there, and Zoe and Jen would be having *sex in space*, yo--when they take off their clothes, they're weightless...just, think on that for a moment. Ahem. If you'd like to write about a pairing romantically, that's awesome. Please don't feel pressured to write any rating higher than you feel comfortable with, because, as I said before, I read it all. Sweet domestic shit where they have their own rhythm and move around each other in perfect sync without talking is pretty damn hot, too, so.

HOWEVER. If coupling these people up is not working for you, or something you're not remotely or even vaguely intersted in thinking about, much less writing about, that is *perfectly fine*. I love stories about partners/friends who have been that way for a while. I love that trust there, the loyalty to their own work and to each other is always really inspiring (? i guess that's the right word. yeah, inspiring. and reassuring, that there are people like that out there) to watch. And I like the idea that the two of them work better together than apart, what's that called? Synchonisity? no...Synergy! That's it, synergy. That's what Scorpion as a company has, what Jen and Zoe could get going in the lab on the right project, and What Rose and Lissa have going when it comes to protecting her and the awareness of her well-being and surroundings. I love people working together and everything beging *better* for it, even them. So friends are good, too. Though fanfic may make it seem unlikely, characters don't *actually* have to sleep with everyone in their lives that didn't actively give birth to or father them (and even then, some fandoms, dude...) So while I'd love me some femslash this holiday season (if you even matched on DG or VA), no worries if it's not your thing to write, you know? There's SO much you could write about, I don't want to drag you down on the one detail.]

because I haven't caught up on season 2, Doctor Who, from Nine all the way through, Elementary (though not the end of last season or any of this), Mortal Instruments Series (minus the last book--SPEAKING OF WHICH, I haven't finished Last Sacrifice, either, so if you could avoid details about that, if you're a book reader and writing about Vampire Acadamey, that'd really be appreciated. I sort of know what happens--I picked up Bloodlines out of curiosity, but not the details, not the whole ride), Early parts of Hawkeye, Black Widow, and Captian Marvel comics, which are all made of win, and, possibly most importanly and closest to my heart: Lost Girl. Well, Lost Girl and the whole Marvel Cinematic Universe kinda are neck and neck, with the Jossverse just a head behind (and that's only 'cause I've had years to play with it) with the Stargate universe in fourth by half a length (again, time to play), when it comes to universes and shows to plant crossovers in. Though BSG, Star Trek: AOS, and Leverage crossovers always seem to turn into a lot of fun, too. But I mean, Lost Girl has Kenzi, and Tamsin, and Bo, and Dyson, and Lauren! That's fun in a bottle. I mean, maybe a succubus wouldn't be a great volunteer for a seven year mission in space, but there are other options.

I am not, by the way, *expecting* a crossover. It's just, I notice people say they'd like one or like them or whatever, but then don't leave details about what shows they might like to see involved to give the other writer a chance to see if they might be able to do that at all.

This is already way long, so I'm just going to tell you briefly what it is about each show that I love so much.

not just a little smart thenCollapse )

Vampire Academy:
vamps with a heartbeat, yoCollapse )

Defying Gravity:
how many clothes were they allowed to take?Collapse )

Okay, so there's all that. Now, believe it or not, I sort of have a favor to ask? It's not a particularly long list, but it's sort of the things in fic I *really* don't want to read about. So if you could maybe not include them in the fic? That'd be so awesome. The stuff: rape/non-con, major character death, mpreg, the kind of sex crap you had to google the first time you read the name for it, and really, lately, I haven't really been feeling the d/s so much (but that's kind of on another list from the others. that's more of a "if you wouldn't mind, thanks," rather than "I'm going to have trouble reading what you wrote.")

...And I think that's all I've got! Have fun! And if you missed it at the top: Thank you so much!!! I'm so excited!!!
Current Mood: excitedexcited
21 October 2014 @ 04:36 am
It's not that I'm not loudly among those who viciously protested the network's ending of Firefly--because, oh, I very much was.  God, I was obnoxious about it, and the poor people who bore the brunt of my wrath? *mostly* hadn't seen the show.  And now hear about it, loudly, when the playoffs both a) do not contain the Tigers (jesus guys, wtf *happened* this year?  you know what?  I actually don't want to talk about it.) and b) keep busting into a show I want to watch and fuck with it's airing schedule...I'm looking at YOU, FUX, and your airing of Gotham, which I can't seem to catch, even though I've got it on, like, !!RECORD ALL EPISODES EVER!!  ...part of that may be because no one gave me time to set the recorder before we dashed off to see the baby get all born, but still.  World Series comes around, and I get twitchy that my show that I might get attached to is going to die a terrible death because Fux can't figure out how to air the damn thing.

It's possible I have residual anger issues about other cancelled before their time shows, and funnel it all at FOX.  They fuck up in so many other ways I don't really air out, I don't feel too bad about harping on this one.

Also, I'm feeling a hell of a lot of premature angst about the fact that they've wrapped Lost Girl.  Like, what kind of bastards *fire* Anna Silk?!  She's like, far too nice to put out of a job, I swear.  Not that the rest of the cast *isn't* nice, but like, that woman is just kind in a way that you don't run into all the time, and should be treated...just...*more nicely*!  Skarsten strikes me as kind in the same way, but slightly more--like, she's that way once she's met you for more than thirty seconds.  Maybe.  I don't really know.  I've never actually had the pleasure of meeting *anyone* who works for the show.  And that fucking tragedy is all on me, 'cause Paul and Rachel were totally at MCCC this year, and my broke ass couldn't go.  It's possible I'm still a bit bitter about this.

But back to what I was thinking about earlier that made me start typing in the first place:  I was wicked pissed when they canceled Firefly.  But it's only NOW, after I've gotten to know the way Joss likes to tell stories when he has full say-so and, you know, money or lack of long-term consequences, that I realize what a GIFT only having half a season, or just a first season, however you want to count it, really was.  Because I don't know if everyone watching everything he's ever made has really collated their emotional responses once things get past, say 13 episodes or so, but just as everything gets awesome and comfortable, and you realize just how much you love this shit:  EVERYTHING GETS FUCKED UP AND GOES TO HELL.  People die.  Situations *change.*  (SHIELD, I'm looking at YOU)  Which make *people* change.  (Go ahead, compare Wesley on Buffy to Wes at the end of Angel.  Fucker was a changed man.  Hell, do the same with Cordy, skip season 4, because seriously, wtf? i'm not even sure carpenter knew, dude.)  And it's awesome, don't get me wrong.  Oh, god, no; you love it!  It's great!  Hell, you're sucked in and can't stop watchhing.  But also:  It's NOT the same show.

I mean, ask yourself.  Once Buffy slept with Angel, and he offed Jenny, was it really the same show?  No.  No, it really wasn't.  Shit got real.  And that was the fucking point, obviously.  That was the point.

But check the first season.  Man wrote it to be one arc in case it all got cancelled and sets got broken down and actors got let go and he never got to write his awesome as hell show with all of its depth and horror and humor and pain and joy.  But that first season is almost like watching another show, really, the tone is so different.  And it's a good show, just different.  I liked it.  I'm not sure I would have seen the rest coming, though.

And that's the thing.  I'm okay living in a world where really awful shit does not happen to the Firefly crew.  (okay, where some hideous shit happened during Serenity, but now they're still flying, and the horizon's looking brighter.  I don't care if it's cause they're flying toward's the sunrise. Brighter's brighter.)  Because if the show had been allowed to go on...I mean, when's the last time Joss (i think it's kinda cool you can't just say "whedon" anymore.  wtg, family! (and I include Mo in that, I don't care if her last name isn't Whedon, she's twisty and devious like one.  and also part of the family, so.)) ever let any happily in love couple *stay* happily in love?  Yeah.  Exactly.  So, there's that.  And River was fucked up *nuts*.  The movie wouldn't have explained and fixed that, and it would have been kind of sad to watch Summer be crazy for how many years?  She's a really awesome actress, I like her functionally crazy, like the movie made her--way more cool.  I'm really okay living in a world where I know who's on the crew and they keep flying and keep almost sort of functioning in a way that makes me think that one day they're all gonna get their shit together and Mal's gonna get with Inara and Simon and Kaylee are gonna stay together, and everything's gonna be alright. I like that feeling.

This is all a really loooong way for me to go to try and convince myself that *maybe* the end of Lost Girl will actually be okay.  It's SOOO *REALLLY* not working.  Just.  Bad decision making, Showcase.  I didn't even know you *existed* until your awesome show showed up and made me pay attention.  And now you're just gonna make it go away?

Current Mood: nostalgicnostalgic
17 October 2014 @ 06:10 am
Oh, oh how I hate the vicious thing that is the eater of LJ entries just as you are about to hit post.

My last hour or so of typing is going to now get narrowed down to bullet points and I'll write more again tomorrow.

  • OMG, my sister had her baby! Pip's awesome and tiny and beautiful and amazing and surprisingly pale and so, so soft.

  • Dannon Oikos Greek Yogurt is fucking a-mazing!

  • My sister is the best when she's on painkillers; she has absolutely no worries at ALL.

  • During labor, both my brother in law and my sister were making fantasy football trades. or making sure they went through. or something like that.

  • Pip's body is in the 16% (or something close to it--low like that), while his head is in the 96% (again, approximately. maybe 94th? mid-high nineties, anyway); his wee lil neck!

  • I just know this is when it's all going to change, when instead of them as a couple coming up here, they as a family are going to stay down there, and the three of us adults will go down there to visit them and do family things that way.

  • I am ridiculously proud of my sister. She so loves and adores Pip.

  • It was really cool to see mom and dad do the infant shuffle and care for a wee tiny tiny brand new baby. I didn't really get to witness it the first go-round. They're pretty damn good at it, if I do say so myself.

Tags: ,
Current Mood: mellowmellow
05 October 2014 @ 07:49 am
I'm fully aware that my life is not the crux upon which others' pivot. This is not a news flash. But.

But I do hold some place in some other peoples' lives, if only because I pay to be there. And it seems weird that...

OK, I've applied for Disability from the state and on a federal level, and actually have an attorney for the federal work, because there's just so MUCH of it. Well, I've been trying to keep her updated with the local crap, too, because it can have bearing on the federal, sometimes, but lately, every time I call or email, I don't get a response. And I get it, they're busy people, and really, what is there to say to "I agreed to a hearing via-telephone"? Not a whole hell of a lot, right? Though I did ask if she could come, like if that was part of the agreement, and I got no answer. *That* could have been answered.

Anyway, after about six months of waiting, I finally get a hearing date. Two weeks later, I get a letter in the mail from my attorney telling me that she's accepted a job with the Social Security Attorney's office and my case is being transferred to someone else in the firm, here, I need to sign this to make her my representative. My case goes to trial or whatever in, like, a month or less! CRAPPY TIMING! I mean, yea! for her and her new job, that's really cool if she wanted to move on or whatever, felt it was a better fit, is going to make more money/get the hell out of dodge, what have you. She was a nice enough person when I did see her that she a) inspired confidence in me that she could win my case and b) made me like her well enough that I would like her to have the kind of life she'd like, and if that's with another company, than that's with another company. I just wish she could have seen my case through.

It's been really morally suck-tastic, dealing with DHS, who claim I don't have enough medical evidence backing up my claim of disability. Well, no, the doctor they sent me to, who saw me for five minutes...no, he didn't have a grip on my physical state, despite his check marks and whatever the hell he wrote down. He checked boxes for things he didn't even ask questions about. He didn't even measure my range of motion, yet marked it complete. If there is one thing I have learned about repeat visits to physical therapy, it is that my range of motion is pathetically limited by my ridic tense neck and shoulder and back muscles. I over compensate by twisting my whole upper body. Apparently, many people can check their blind spot while driving by only moving their head. I did not know this until one of my physical therapists asked me how I did it and I was thusly enlightened. They said they only wanted the last year's worth of doctor's files, so I thought it'd be pointless to dredge up the last, oh, god, 19 years of treatment that has led to me finally asking for some assistance. It wasn't like I woke up with a headache and thought "Hey! Maybe the government can give me some money!" I had to be talked into this shit! (well, and then it became apparent I was *unable* to support myself). So at the last DHS hearing, I got turned down again because of lack of medical evidence, and, basically, because I pulled my shit together enough to sound like a person. Like, they could understand me over the phone, and I could use complete sentences, so they held that against me. Because if I could do it for the hearing, I must be able to do it for a job.

What they don't know is that I got home just after the migraine aura started, and didn't move from my bed for the rest of the day. That hour of pulling my shit together took all the energy I'd stored for a week, and the rest of the week's time to recover from using so much. I had a migraine that kept me in bed for the next three days, and practically worshiping the beautiful Zofran Gods that kept me from falling into a hurling cycle (because for me, it's not just enough to throw up, I have to keep doing it, on a schedule, regardless of my stomach's contents. Over the years, I've cultivated one hell of a gag reflex, in an incredibly boring and rather uncomfortable manner (note to those currently working on their own: if you're thinking a mantra might work, don't use the verbs you're trying to avoid taking part in. It's not "I'm not gonna hurl, I'm not gonna hurl...", it's "Everything is calm, I am relaxed, I breathe slowly in, and slowly out, everything is calm and relaxed..." You speak to the state you want to be in, not even mentioning or giving voice to the things that will impede you getting to that state. If you use the word, you get a mental image, which lingers, and sends impulses to the mental image's muscles. At least that's how I've always thought of it, and at this point, I'm wicked good at talking myself out of puking, whether it's migraine-related or not.) That's right, bitches, I cultivated a skill outta this shit. I'll admit, probably quite a few, but I don't really feel like talking about the silver lining just now. That's another one: I can find a fucking silver lining in just about any situation. Some are pretty fucking thin, some might be more glitter than a solid silver, or sort of a pewter than shiny silver, and many are speaking in relative terms, but I can find it in there somewhere. I find myself really annoying at times when I do that.

There's this thing about me that I hate sometimes. It's things I do, not everything, just a few things, sort of personality-wise, that I can't remember if they were there before I started having migraines or not. Like, is this, whatever it is today, *me*, or is it me because I'm sick? Like, I became that way to cope with all the constant pain? The thing is, it all started when I was 13. I'm never really gonna know. I was always sarcastic, I do know that. But it was never quite so...harsh. It didn't always bite. Was that something I would have just grown into eventually when I got older? I always deflect with humor, but I can't remember really doing so when people asked health questions when I was 13. Relationship status? hell, yeah. I was fucking 13, and usually the family member asking was just asking to be nosy as hell, not out of any interest in my personal happiness. But would I have kept it up to this degree, to where I have to remind myself before a conversation begins, during the conversation, and while it ends, to actually answer the questions that are being asked truthfully and without joking them off? I'd like to hope not.

I can't stand being in crowds, and I'm drained after spending time in a room with, honestly, even just another person, but if there are three other people in the room, I start planning exit strategies. I feel other people's tension, or where I imagine there must be tension, and it makes my skin crawl and my breathing short and my heart beat harder and faster and I leave before I get to full on Panic Attack. That's just four people in an average sized family room. What. The. Fuck? I do genuinely like people better than this.

But now I've done it.. jesus. I'm getting all...freaked out, and I'm only presenting scenarios that make me uncomfortable. They're not even events on a calendar!

There was this show on NBC that I adored. I really loved it. Mercy, it was called. It was about nurses, and focused on Veronica, a nurse who'd just come back from Afghanistan, working as a medic--or nurse, more likely, given her profession. The point is, she had wicked PTSD, and didn't want to talk, at all, about the war, or about being a nurse in the middle of a war zone. One of my favorite quotes ever came from that show, from Veronica: okay, we're not even talking about feelings right now, we are talking about a place where people go to talk about feelings, and I'm freaking out. The strength of my love for that quote is rivaled quite closely by the feelings I have for the following, also from the show and her: "I like my feelings pressed down, compressed. So they come out at random and inappropriate times." a wee bit painful for their truth, those quotes.

But, as it happened, the networked world was not ready just then for a show about our soldiers coming home with emotional baggage. It was way more prepared for some hot chicks to be sent to a Women's Correctional Facility, be strongly reminded that as Lily put it on How I Met Your Mother, "a woman's sexuality is a moving target," and wear Orange for a few years. Well, at least Taylor Schilling keeps getting a paycheck.
Current Mood: scaredscared
08 September 2014 @ 09:04 am
I am so ready for some Lost Girl, I don't even know how to explain. They've been filming all summer, they've been doing their ADR...I'm ready for SEASON FIVE, baby! And some fuckin' FIX-IT...that I have a sense isn't really coming all that fast. If, you know, at all.

I'm not precisely pleased with the end of season 4. I'm not exactly pleased with season 4, period. But, from a Kenzi-only standpoint, her character had a good arc and, compared to many others, a good death on the show. But I don't really think killing her was the way to go. I don't know how I would have gone about it differently, maybe the whole damn train idea was a bust, I'm not sure.

The only thing I DID like was that it looked like Tamsin and Bo were moving closer to getting together...right up until the end of the freakin' finale. But at least Lauren's interesting again, so. I just sort of fear that all of Tamsin's human growth is going to suffer by the wayside because now we're going to need the comedy that Kenzi used to provide, and Tamsin's sense of humor is--can be--similar at times, or could be, when she was all Officer Slamsin, not so much the Valkyrie who just finished growing up in a house where she was loved and looked after. Though she DID still know what buttons to push to make Bo feed when she needed to, so points to the Valkyrie. I really don't want another Tortured Season 3 Bo/Lauren Angst Fest, hot as it really was. It was painful, you know?

Why can't they just all be happy together again? grrr...
It's not exactly like I'm in new territory here. It just always feels that way. It's exhausting. I'd like, for once, to just...be done. (with the spiral) But then I'd like a Pegasus, too, so.

My problem, this time around and at the moment, is that I've never quite come to terms with the fact that all my goals and life plans that I've made since...ever, really--all the things I'd planned to do with my life when I was in High School, and then the changes I made to the plan in University, and even the changes I made in Grad School--all changes I got progressively more excited about because they got more refined and specific--all those hopes and goals and things I was looking forward to just got shoved into a box marked "Sorry, Not Gonna Happen," and stuck in a corner when I got sick and then sicker and more sick. And every time I make a new plan and try to go through with it, my body gets in the way again, and it's another slice of my soul crushed.

It's not just exhausting, it's demoralizing.
Current Mood: crushedcrushed
12 February 2014 @ 08:51 pm
For a good portion of the day, I was carrying around this feeling in the pit of my stomach that there was a prophecy on Lost Girl about how the heir of Zamora was going to have their blood spilled, and that the prophecy really means Kenzi as the heir, because, well, she'd have been the heir once they were married, you know? But I've changed my worry: now I'm worried about the "warrior that fights at her side," because who the hell has been fighting next to Bo the most and for the longest other than Kenzi? (maybe a little worried there for Tamsin, 'cause, hey, she's a total warrior, but since last season's cliff hanger had her life in the balance, it seems kinda repetitive to put her in jeopardy again, you know?) I'm just worried about Kenz in general. The entire Unclaim Me scene was enough to break what was left of my heart, because when Bo finally gave in, Kenzi didn't even look happy about it, she looked like one more person had let her down. I hope Dyson claims her before it becomes a problem. And then Bo can claim her back when Kenzi has her head on straight again.

The whole idea of humans needing to be claimed in fae society is a bit barbaric, obviously. Only a couple of weeks ago I was having a comment-discussion on AO3 with an author about how Kenzi and Lauren see being claimed differently. Kenzi sees it as having a home, but Lauren just sees it as another cage. Lauren would only grow to hate whoever claimed her, however noble the original intent. Kenzi...I think Kenz would have always seen it as a touchstone, her family she made with Bo. Both of them, hell, Lauren, too, have found families, families that are so much stronger and filled with so much love, I suppose it makes them all the more dangerous (and it painful) if they end up betraying you, intentionally or not.

On a "I'll still be able to watch this episode" note: The Lewis Solution For Difficult Fae!!! OMG! I also wish there weren't two meanings of the word "solution." Just...Zoie Palmer is a fucking scene maker, I love it. "Are you trying to melt me? That's adorable!" And Emmanuelle Vagueir continues to prove she's comedic gold with "SHIT! Something's happening! Something's on my nose! Get it off!" "You have an itch. Humans do that" heheheh, oh, poor, panicking, human Evony.

I actually have some really huge ethical issues with Lauren turning Evony human--it's X-Men 3, where they all decide to turn Magneto, but only after, like, some really serious eye contact that promises they understand the implications of what they're doing. While I'm sure Lauren, of all people, has thought through the implications of turning a fae human, it seems like she just jumped at the chance to turn the Morrigan, and I don't like it. Power vacuum, for one. No more Ms. Vaugier, for second--humans are awfully fragile in this world, yo. for a show that emphasizes choice so heavily, Lauren snapped hers away without a second's thought. Then again, the other day, I described the Morrigan to Dad as not just evil, but The Evil, the Leader of all the Evil, so. She's had a chance to make all the right choices she was gonna make, I guess.

I just really love this show, even in all of it's fucked-upness, and don't want to lose any more of the people who make it as awesome as it is. Like, really, the only person I'm ok losing in the finale is poor adorable Henry/Rainer (man he made a fantastic vamp in Blood Ties, dude! I heart him for that, and want to slap his face off this show. I can't even.) Or, maybe, if they have to, Vex, Evony, Bruce, or Trick. Not that I want any of them to be offed, but that preview of Bo driving to the chick singing "The Wanderer" and getting out and going to a grave is still out there. Her mom, maybe? DUDE I don't know! it's killing me!
29 January 2014 @ 09:59 am
I had JUST been comparing Lost Girl, favorably, I thought, to the buffyverse, and the care they took with their character's lives, like, three days ago! How they take things seriously, and it's not just for thrills and shit that they off main cast members. And Oh, I get it. And I'll admit that I'd never really gotten the whole epic love between the two of them, they were in the friend zone for me, but sweet Jesus, Ksenia Solo will rip out your heart and stomp on it before handing it back to you at the end of the scene, man! She was going to say yes! She made Bo chi-suck her! she was gonna say yes.

and the bastards, knew, too! with the ear bleeding! and just--Bo wanted to help so bad, but all she could do was calm Kenz down and keep her from choking on her own hyperventilating and sob with her, cause shit! fucking massimo. Tamsin should feel free to go swirl a dagger in his entrails, then let Kenzi take back the twig dealio, and let Dyson rip out his throat, if he's still breathing at that point.

I just... Kenzi again? damn, people!

P.S. Henry Fitzroy...nice choice. :)

so much for that fic I started with Hale worrying about their limited time 'cause she's all human.
Current Mood: crushedcrushed
16 October 2013 @ 06:52 am
So, I forgot to mention in my Yule Goat letter, that if you're trying to skulk (which is cool, I do it too, it just sounds so...ominous. Whatever.) Uh, if you are, I've sorta recently split my time between here and meansbloodytoo. Now, when I say recently, I really mean "recently," as I think the last thing over there was my last Yuletide letter. Which, I mean, hey, if it helps, go crazy. No, I do not remember why I used this particular account--no, wait, I do, it has the email address I still use. It's all coming back to me. Also, if you're looking for what I bookmark on AO3? it's alsomeansbloody, which is what I signed up with. So you are in the right spot. So that's that.

current writing, old lost girl, and new agents of shieldCollapse )
Current Mood: draineddrained
14 October 2013 @ 08:16 am
Dear My Wonderfully Gifted And Talented Yule Goat,

Upfront you should totally know I think you're awesome, just based on your superior taste alone. I mean, we matched on something, and I love my fandoms, so you already rank among the people who are totally rockin' without even trying. Also you should remember that while I wrote a lot in the optional details section, optional details are optional, so if something I said made you worry, pretend I didn't say it. Cause I'm stoked I'm getting a story, period. The fact that it's in one of my favorite fandoms totally rocks, and the fact that you might read this as well is, like, ...I'm out of words, quite honestly. It's like icing on the cake, and to tell you the truth, I don't usually get birthday cake, I get birthday cookies, 'cause I like them better. Metaphor didn't even work, there. Whatever, it's wonderful.

So there are things in general that I like in stories, no matter the fandom. I like partners, and people who have each others' backs, sparring, knives, getting back up, pasts, nicknames, helping people heal, horses, AUs, crossovers, threesomes (or whatever-somes. hey, some people have a lot of love to give, ok? And some fandoms were meant for them to just be a giant lovefest, I'm pretty well convinced. But I'm not writing this, so don't do anything that's going to strain a muscle), baking bread, competency, playing instruments, listening to music, sleeping (and sleeping arrangements), staring at the stars, driving, autumn, cider mills. Go crazy, really. I want you to have some amount of fun when you write, so you can completely ignore me if you've got this thing you need to get out of your head--I say enjoy yourself!

if you do want further insight, however, believe it or not, I can come up with more to say!
Just follow me...Collapse )
Current Mood: excitedexcited